Psalm 78:39 For he remembered that they were but flesh; a wind that passeth away, and cometh not again.
Psalm 78 is a concise history of Israel. It rehearses the story of the Israelites as they left Egypt and traveled toward the promised land. During their journey, they complain over and over. They turn back on God over and over. Yet, over and over the Lord delivers them and provides for them.
You know, I've been catching myself complaining lately. I grumble and mumble, mostly under my breath, but it shows on my countenance that I am not content! I was just smitten by the Holy Spirit about it yesterday. Now, today, I read about the children of Israel and how they griped - and I didn't read it in Exodus, oh no! I read it in Psalms! I think the Lord is trying to tell me something. And it is this: stop complaining. I need to just take God at His Word with confidence that He will keep His promises! I know He will, I've seen Him do it over and over! So, this is not a stretch for me to believe. In fact, it should be automatic. But, I am just flesh. I fail. I often make the same mistakes over and over. I grow weary of being in this trial....when will it end?! When I feel panicky, I must turn to God, He will help me. I must guard my mouth for it will not!
I'm so grateful for this verse! I'm so happy that God remembers I'm flesh, that my life is just a breeze that will not come again. So is this trial. Contrary to popular belief, it will not last forever. He will see me through it. I'm thankful for God's mercy and forgiveness!
Well, now that I've been thoroughly convicted of my sin, I think I'll go on with my day. But not in my flesh, in His strength.
Monday, October 31, 2011
Friday, October 28, 2011
Blossoms in the Desert
Is. 35:1 The wilderness and the solitary place shall be glad for them; and the desert shall rejoice, and blossom as the rose.
This verse captured my imagination today! The wilderness and desert shall rejoice? There will be roses blossoming in the desert? I know that there is a really deep truth to this passage. It's referring to the gathering of Israel. Isaiah is a prophet for the people of Israel, his words refer directly to them.
But think about this! Isn't it true that God takes our desert moments, our wilderness experiences, and turns them into something beautiful? God did that for the children of Israel when they were leaving Egypt. They were not in a pretty place, they were not in fun circumstances, yet over and over, God provided in amazing ways! He sent them blessings that they would not have seen anywhere else!
I can say that God has done that for me, too. Because of suffering with PPD not once, but twice, I saw the Lord work in my life in ways others have missed out on. Because of losing my Dad suddenly when I was 26 years old, I've seen God work miracles in my life. I've received blessings from His hand that I would not have gotten if Dad were still here. Do I wish the Lord could have left him here longer? Oh yes! That will never change. But if I have to go through hard times, I'm so thankful I have the Lord to go with me. He sends blossoms in the desert to make the journey easier, and that is a great blessing.
Are you in a personal wilderness today? Is your desert hot and dry? You are not alone! Cry out to your Heavenly Father and request a few roses! He will send them, and even better, He will see you through to the other side. If you don't know the Lord as your Savior, then go HERE for more information, or write me using the contact page above. He's waiting with open arms for you, to see you through and to send you some blossoms in the desert.
This verse captured my imagination today! The wilderness and desert shall rejoice? There will be roses blossoming in the desert? I know that there is a really deep truth to this passage. It's referring to the gathering of Israel. Isaiah is a prophet for the people of Israel, his words refer directly to them.
But think about this! Isn't it true that God takes our desert moments, our wilderness experiences, and turns them into something beautiful? God did that for the children of Israel when they were leaving Egypt. They were not in a pretty place, they were not in fun circumstances, yet over and over, God provided in amazing ways! He sent them blessings that they would not have seen anywhere else!
I can say that God has done that for me, too. Because of suffering with PPD not once, but twice, I saw the Lord work in my life in ways others have missed out on. Because of losing my Dad suddenly when I was 26 years old, I've seen God work miracles in my life. I've received blessings from His hand that I would not have gotten if Dad were still here. Do I wish the Lord could have left him here longer? Oh yes! That will never change. But if I have to go through hard times, I'm so thankful I have the Lord to go with me. He sends blossoms in the desert to make the journey easier, and that is a great blessing.
Are you in a personal wilderness today? Is your desert hot and dry? You are not alone! Cry out to your Heavenly Father and request a few roses! He will send them, and even better, He will see you through to the other side. If you don't know the Lord as your Savior, then go HERE for more information, or write me using the contact page above. He's waiting with open arms for you, to see you through and to send you some blossoms in the desert.
Thursday, October 27, 2011
My Prayer
Psalm 71:18 Now also when I am old and grayheaded, O God, forsake me not; until I have shewed they strength unto this generation, and thy power to every one that is to come.
I grew up in a Baptist church where the pastor was bold, and told it like it was! No sugar-coating or treading lightly. He often told us young people that most of us would not stay in church as adults, because we were only coming because our parents made us. It wasn't in our own hearts to be there, in fact, some of us were rebelling inside about being at church. Ouch! I really liked church as a kid, but, in the spirit of being "real", the main reason I liked it was because my friends were there. I loved to talk! :) I remember thinking about his words about church in the car on the way home one night. I wondered to myself if I would stay in church, or fall out? I wasn't sure.
I have good news for my pastor and all of you! I stayed in church! And, I love going to church! Not because I get to talk to people, either. I really love the preaching of God's Word. The difference in my feelings now compared to as an eight year old girl, is that I'm saved! I wasn't even born again way back when. Another difference is maturity. I didn't understand a lot of the verses and sermons that I heard as a child, but I do now! Well...most of them. ;)
My prayer now, as an adult, is that I would stay faithful to the Lord in all areas of my life: my Bible time, prayer time, church attendance, witnessing, serving in some area, until I die. I pray that I cling to the promises of God's Word until I've shown God's power to my children and the generation to come after me. 1 Cor. 10:12 reminds us that we should never assume we are standing strong in the faith. Just as soon as I think, "I'll be faithful till the end, no problem!" I'll find myself away from God, doing my own thing. Why? Because of pride! I want to stay faithful to the Lord, that's my goal, but I know I can only do it with His help.
I grew up in a Baptist church where the pastor was bold, and told it like it was! No sugar-coating or treading lightly. He often told us young people that most of us would not stay in church as adults, because we were only coming because our parents made us. It wasn't in our own hearts to be there, in fact, some of us were rebelling inside about being at church. Ouch! I really liked church as a kid, but, in the spirit of being "real", the main reason I liked it was because my friends were there. I loved to talk! :) I remember thinking about his words about church in the car on the way home one night. I wondered to myself if I would stay in church, or fall out? I wasn't sure.
I have good news for my pastor and all of you! I stayed in church! And, I love going to church! Not because I get to talk to people, either. I really love the preaching of God's Word. The difference in my feelings now compared to as an eight year old girl, is that I'm saved! I wasn't even born again way back when. Another difference is maturity. I didn't understand a lot of the verses and sermons that I heard as a child, but I do now! Well...most of them. ;)
My prayer now, as an adult, is that I would stay faithful to the Lord in all areas of my life: my Bible time, prayer time, church attendance, witnessing, serving in some area, until I die. I pray that I cling to the promises of God's Word until I've shown God's power to my children and the generation to come after me. 1 Cor. 10:12 reminds us that we should never assume we are standing strong in the faith. Just as soon as I think, "I'll be faithful till the end, no problem!" I'll find myself away from God, doing my own thing. Why? Because of pride! I want to stay faithful to the Lord, that's my goal, but I know I can only do it with His help.
Wednesday, October 26, 2011
Screams of Love
Psalm 69:20 Reproach hath broken my heart; and I am full of heaviness: and I looked for some to take pity, but there was none; and for comforters, but I found none.
I've spent my entire life around Christian people. The ones I was closest to, my family, were genuine. They battled the flesh, turned to God's Word, got victory, grew, and then battled the flesh in some other area and the process repeated itself. While growing up, I noticed there were other Christians who never seemed to battle anything. If you talked to them, they were strong in faith, always upbeat, positive and victorious in their Christian lives. Then, a few years went by, and they left church completely for some unknown reason, or they fell into sin and didn't want to get up again. That was that. So much for the constant grin they once had! I try just to be real - let folks know that yes, I struggle. Likewise, I try tell folks that yes, I know where to go for help - the Bible and my Heavenly Father!
When my Dad died suddenly seven years ago, I cannot begin to tell you some of the stupid comments people made to me at the funeral. They meant well, but man! Did they ever hurt an already breaking heart! When I was in the throws of PPD (but didn't know it) a preacher that I believed I could trust blew me off completely. It wasn't long after that the thought of just going on to Heaven was in my mind. I came very close to taking God's most precious gift to me, my life. I didn't know I had a medical condition that could be corrected. I just knew I was hurting, and that I needed someone to care. I didn't dare tell anyone else about my problem after that, because I couldn't bare someone else ignoring my cries for help.
David understands what I'm talking about. In the verse today, he is hurting. He looks for comforters and finds none. No one cares, no one understands. Yes, we as believers have the Lord, but we need each other, too. Sometimes, I just need to "vent". Sometimes, I need to weep. Sometimes, I need someone to listen without judging me.
The Lord has proven to me that He is enough, He's also given me a wonderful listener in my husband and mother and sister. They don't judge me or criticize me, they just care about me. They put up with my ups and downs without keeping track of my failures. That speaks, no screams, "I LOVE YOU!"
This verse today reminded me that there are many hurting, struggling people out there. I want to be sure that I'm a listener and not a critic the next time someone needs to feel loved. In fact, I think I'll look for someone to scream love to. :)
I've spent my entire life around Christian people. The ones I was closest to, my family, were genuine. They battled the flesh, turned to God's Word, got victory, grew, and then battled the flesh in some other area and the process repeated itself. While growing up, I noticed there were other Christians who never seemed to battle anything. If you talked to them, they were strong in faith, always upbeat, positive and victorious in their Christian lives. Then, a few years went by, and they left church completely for some unknown reason, or they fell into sin and didn't want to get up again. That was that. So much for the constant grin they once had! I try just to be real - let folks know that yes, I struggle. Likewise, I try tell folks that yes, I know where to go for help - the Bible and my Heavenly Father!
When my Dad died suddenly seven years ago, I cannot begin to tell you some of the stupid comments people made to me at the funeral. They meant well, but man! Did they ever hurt an already breaking heart! When I was in the throws of PPD (but didn't know it) a preacher that I believed I could trust blew me off completely. It wasn't long after that the thought of just going on to Heaven was in my mind. I came very close to taking God's most precious gift to me, my life. I didn't know I had a medical condition that could be corrected. I just knew I was hurting, and that I needed someone to care. I didn't dare tell anyone else about my problem after that, because I couldn't bare someone else ignoring my cries for help.
David understands what I'm talking about. In the verse today, he is hurting. He looks for comforters and finds none. No one cares, no one understands. Yes, we as believers have the Lord, but we need each other, too. Sometimes, I just need to "vent". Sometimes, I need to weep. Sometimes, I need someone to listen without judging me.
The Lord has proven to me that He is enough, He's also given me a wonderful listener in my husband and mother and sister. They don't judge me or criticize me, they just care about me. They put up with my ups and downs without keeping track of my failures. That speaks, no screams, "I LOVE YOU!"
This verse today reminded me that there are many hurting, struggling people out there. I want to be sure that I'm a listener and not a critic the next time someone needs to feel loved. In fact, I think I'll look for someone to scream love to. :)
Tuesday, October 25, 2011
But If Not
Dan. 3:17-18 If it be so, our God whom we serve is able to deliver us from the burning fiery furnace, and he will deliver us out of thine hand, O king. But if not, be it known unto thee, O king, that we will not serve thy gods, nor worship the golden image which thou hast set up.
It was probably the hardest trial I'd faced in my 26 years of living. I was driving down a main thoroughfare in Lawrence, Kansas, and my car started huffing and puffing, like it was about to die. It had been doing this for weeks. We had two children, lived in a ghetto, and barely made ends meet from week to week. My Dad died suddenly and our car was too iffy to drive the eight hours to the funeral. Our pastor loaned us his vehicle so we could go home and bury my Dad. Right after that, the knock on the door was the landlord, telling us that if we didn't pay our month overdue rent soon, he'd have to evict us.Our car was a frustrating problem that angered me. In that frustration, I said to the Lord when I was alone, "We're not quitting! It doesn't matter what happens, we're not quitting!" Tears streamed down my face. The truth is, I wanted to quit. I wanted to give up, go back to Arkansas, live in a little house with a white picket fence and try to grow flowers. I was tried of the ghetto, tired of the faulty car, tired of being broke. We worked in the jail ministry, Sunday School, soul winning, choir, and volunteered wherever we were needed. And all of this while my husband was on thirds at work. It felt like the least the Lord could do is keep a roof over our heads and our car running!
That day, I had a choice to make: would I serve the Lord even if He took the roof from over my head? Would I keep serving even if I broke down (right across from KU of all places!) and I had to walk home? Would I serve the Lord if He left me in the ghetto forever? I decided yes. Yes, I would.
I'm not in the ghetto anymore. I haven't been that close to eviction since that day in Lawrence. But, I'm in a trial. I'm weary, I want to quit. I feel forsaken, forgotten, and fruitless. I have a choice to make: will I keep serving the Lord, even if I never see His hand in my life (in a tangible way) again? If I remain alone forever, will I stay faithful to Him? The tears stream down my cheeks, I can't stop them. My heart is heavy with a desire to do more for His cause and tired of fighting Satan who is hindering every tiny effort I make. I'm tired...so very tired.
The three Hebrew boys were ready to take God's promises to the bank in the verse above. They said "Our God can take care of this fiery furnace, no problem!" Then, they had to face this stark possibility: what if He didn't? What if they died? We know the ending, but they didn't. And yet, they boldly declare "BUT IF NOT,...we will NOT serve thy gods nor worship thy golden image..." That's courage. That's faith. That's what I want! Everyone wants to serve God when He's allowing souls to be saved in church, or when He's sending us a check in the mail everyday, or when He's answering every prayer we pray.
But, what about when He seems to have moved away? What about the times He says "No". What if He says, "I'm giving you opposition" or "I'm not going to meet that need"? What then? Can we say "I'm serving You, no matter what, Lord!" or will we quit?
By the way, the Lord sent us the money to catch up on our rent through an amazing source. He also sent the money to us to get our car repaired. And, three months after my Dad went to Heaven, the Lord allowed us to move to Texas, out of the ghetto.
Are you ready to give up? Are you so sad today, you can barely stop the tears for a moment? Me too. Let's not give up, okay? Let's keep going! Let's say with faith that God CAN take care of these problems, but let's go ahead and add, "But if not, I'm serving You anyway!"
And then, let's wait for the miracle!
It was probably the hardest trial I'd faced in my 26 years of living. I was driving down a main thoroughfare in Lawrence, Kansas, and my car started huffing and puffing, like it was about to die. It had been doing this for weeks. We had two children, lived in a ghetto, and barely made ends meet from week to week. My Dad died suddenly and our car was too iffy to drive the eight hours to the funeral. Our pastor loaned us his vehicle so we could go home and bury my Dad. Right after that, the knock on the door was the landlord, telling us that if we didn't pay our month overdue rent soon, he'd have to evict us.Our car was a frustrating problem that angered me. In that frustration, I said to the Lord when I was alone, "We're not quitting! It doesn't matter what happens, we're not quitting!" Tears streamed down my face. The truth is, I wanted to quit. I wanted to give up, go back to Arkansas, live in a little house with a white picket fence and try to grow flowers. I was tried of the ghetto, tired of the faulty car, tired of being broke. We worked in the jail ministry, Sunday School, soul winning, choir, and volunteered wherever we were needed. And all of this while my husband was on thirds at work. It felt like the least the Lord could do is keep a roof over our heads and our car running!
That day, I had a choice to make: would I serve the Lord even if He took the roof from over my head? Would I keep serving even if I broke down (right across from KU of all places!) and I had to walk home? Would I serve the Lord if He left me in the ghetto forever? I decided yes. Yes, I would.
I'm not in the ghetto anymore. I haven't been that close to eviction since that day in Lawrence. But, I'm in a trial. I'm weary, I want to quit. I feel forsaken, forgotten, and fruitless. I have a choice to make: will I keep serving the Lord, even if I never see His hand in my life (in a tangible way) again? If I remain alone forever, will I stay faithful to Him? The tears stream down my cheeks, I can't stop them. My heart is heavy with a desire to do more for His cause and tired of fighting Satan who is hindering every tiny effort I make. I'm tired...so very tired.
The three Hebrew boys were ready to take God's promises to the bank in the verse above. They said "Our God can take care of this fiery furnace, no problem!" Then, they had to face this stark possibility: what if He didn't? What if they died? We know the ending, but they didn't. And yet, they boldly declare "BUT IF NOT,...we will NOT serve thy gods nor worship thy golden image..." That's courage. That's faith. That's what I want! Everyone wants to serve God when He's allowing souls to be saved in church, or when He's sending us a check in the mail everyday, or when He's answering every prayer we pray.
But, what about when He seems to have moved away? What about the times He says "No". What if He says, "I'm giving you opposition" or "I'm not going to meet that need"? What then? Can we say "I'm serving You, no matter what, Lord!" or will we quit?
By the way, the Lord sent us the money to catch up on our rent through an amazing source. He also sent the money to us to get our car repaired. And, three months after my Dad went to Heaven, the Lord allowed us to move to Texas, out of the ghetto.
Are you ready to give up? Are you so sad today, you can barely stop the tears for a moment? Me too. Let's not give up, okay? Let's keep going! Let's say with faith that God CAN take care of these problems, but let's go ahead and add, "But if not, I'm serving You anyway!"
And then, let's wait for the miracle!
Monday, October 24, 2011
Back to Reality
Psalm 63:1-2 O God, thou art my God; early will I seek thee: my soul thirsteth for thee, my flesh longeth for thee in a dry and thirsty land, where no water is; To see thy power and glory, so as I have seen thee in the sanctuary.
Well, as some of you may know, I just returned from a whirlwind trip to the windy city, Chicago! Thank you to those of you that prayed for me. I cannot begin to explain how wonderful it was to be at that conference. The people there said I was a blessing to them, but I know for a fact that they ministered to me far more than I did to them. Their friendliness bowled me over, I haven't been made to feel that wanted in all of my life! The music was so beautiful, their smiles radiant, and their laughter contagious. My dry, parched soul soaked it up and wanted more!
It was wonderful to wrap my arms around my sweet babies yesterday afternoon, and of course, get a smooch from the man. ;-) But, I wasn't home long before the dirty laundry, messy floors, and needs of the children (combined with my extreme fatigue) overwhelmed me. I wanted to go back to my Chicago friends, sing songs, laugh and visit. But, I'd take the kids with me this time!. :)
I'm sitting here, amid the clutter that collects when mom is away, reading my Bible, wishing to go back, wishing to feel that "soaking" of joy and love again. But, my Best Friend came to meet with me today. He knew that I'd feel a bit sad and lonely to have left such wonderful people so far away. He knows I'm thirsting for Him in this dry land. He knows I'm longing to see His hand work miracles! Here are some words He said to me today:
Psalm 61:2 From the end of the earth will I cry unto thee, when my heart is overwhelmed: lead me to the rock that is higher than I.
Psalm 62:8 Trust in him at all times; ye people, pour out your heart before him: God is a refuge for us. Selah.
Psalm 63: 8 My soul followeth hard after thee: thy right hand upholdeth me.
I cry out to Him today, I pour my heart out before Him now, I follow hard after Him during these melancholy moments. He gives me strength, He restores my joy, and renews my spirit. He is...so very good to me.
If anyone from First Baptist Church of Sauk Village, IL, is reading, thank you so much for all you did for me at the conference. God used you to help a very weary sister (me). Thank you!!
Well, as some of you may know, I just returned from a whirlwind trip to the windy city, Chicago! Thank you to those of you that prayed for me. I cannot begin to explain how wonderful it was to be at that conference. The people there said I was a blessing to them, but I know for a fact that they ministered to me far more than I did to them. Their friendliness bowled me over, I haven't been made to feel that wanted in all of my life! The music was so beautiful, their smiles radiant, and their laughter contagious. My dry, parched soul soaked it up and wanted more!
It was wonderful to wrap my arms around my sweet babies yesterday afternoon, and of course, get a smooch from the man. ;-) But, I wasn't home long before the dirty laundry, messy floors, and needs of the children (combined with my extreme fatigue) overwhelmed me. I wanted to go back to my Chicago friends, sing songs, laugh and visit. But, I'd take the kids with me this time!. :)
I'm sitting here, amid the clutter that collects when mom is away, reading my Bible, wishing to go back, wishing to feel that "soaking" of joy and love again. But, my Best Friend came to meet with me today. He knew that I'd feel a bit sad and lonely to have left such wonderful people so far away. He knows I'm thirsting for Him in this dry land. He knows I'm longing to see His hand work miracles! Here are some words He said to me today:
Psalm 61:2 From the end of the earth will I cry unto thee, when my heart is overwhelmed: lead me to the rock that is higher than I.
Psalm 62:8 Trust in him at all times; ye people, pour out your heart before him: God is a refuge for us. Selah.
Psalm 63: 8 My soul followeth hard after thee: thy right hand upholdeth me.
I cry out to Him today, I pour my heart out before Him now, I follow hard after Him during these melancholy moments. He gives me strength, He restores my joy, and renews my spirit. He is...so very good to me.
If anyone from First Baptist Church of Sauk Village, IL, is reading, thank you so much for all you did for me at the conference. God used you to help a very weary sister (me). Thank you!!
Friday, October 21, 2011
Where to Take Broken Toys
Ps. 59:17 Unto thee, O my strength, will I sing: for God is my defence, and the God of my mercy.
The excitement and nerves surrounding this trip to Chicago has been a blessed diversion from the fact that daily, I'm in a battle. Problems, temptations and enemies are all around me. When this excitement is over, I will still have these battles to face. What will I do, then? Will I sit down and wallow in it? Will I mope? Pout? I hope not!
This verse today was an encouragement to me. It reminds me that GOD is my strength! HE is my defense and HE will take care of me. I don't run to him often enough, though. I first try to fix things myself, sometimes many times, before I hand the situation to the Lord as a child hands a broken toy to their parents. One thing about children, though, is that they don't try to fix a broken toy, they immediately bring it to their parents! I suppose they realize their lack of ability to repair it, so they take it to the person they love and trust the most, hoping they have the answer.
That's what I need to do. I need to immediately run to the Lord, the one whom I love and trust the most, for help. I am too inadequate, I can't do anything without Him. I want to be a blessing to the ladies today, but guess what! I'm too inadequate! I'm just flesh and blood, sinful and not smart! I need the Lord to use me, to work through me, to fix me up so I can do this work.
What might it be for you today? Caring for a sick child or parent? More month at the end of the money? Illness yourself? Job loss? Criticism from those whom you though loved you? Loneliness? Whatever it is, take your "broken toy" to the Lord, and let Him fix it. Run to Him for strength and protection. He is only a prayer away.
The excitement and nerves surrounding this trip to Chicago has been a blessed diversion from the fact that daily, I'm in a battle. Problems, temptations and enemies are all around me. When this excitement is over, I will still have these battles to face. What will I do, then? Will I sit down and wallow in it? Will I mope? Pout? I hope not!
This verse today was an encouragement to me. It reminds me that GOD is my strength! HE is my defense and HE will take care of me. I don't run to him often enough, though. I first try to fix things myself, sometimes many times, before I hand the situation to the Lord as a child hands a broken toy to their parents. One thing about children, though, is that they don't try to fix a broken toy, they immediately bring it to their parents! I suppose they realize their lack of ability to repair it, so they take it to the person they love and trust the most, hoping they have the answer.
That's what I need to do. I need to immediately run to the Lord, the one whom I love and trust the most, for help. I am too inadequate, I can't do anything without Him. I want to be a blessing to the ladies today, but guess what! I'm too inadequate! I'm just flesh and blood, sinful and not smart! I need the Lord to use me, to work through me, to fix me up so I can do this work.
What might it be for you today? Caring for a sick child or parent? More month at the end of the money? Illness yourself? Job loss? Criticism from those whom you though loved you? Loneliness? Whatever it is, take your "broken toy" to the Lord, and let Him fix it. Run to Him for strength and protection. He is only a prayer away.
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