He Loves Me Anyway

Psalm 103:12 As far as the east is from the west, so far hath he removed our transgressions from us.13 Like as a father pitieth his children, so the LORD pitieth them that fear him. 14 For he knoweth our frame; he remembereth that we are dust.


I'm feeling kinda blah today. It's probably those blessed hormones that we women get to enjoy! ha! I feel extra sensitive about things that normally don't bother me. It's frustrating to know my mind that feeling a certain way is unreasonable and probably even inaccurate, and be unable to change my feelings! I feel weak, like I just can't keep going. I have no reason to feel this way.

Today, I picked up my Bible and opened up to Psalm 103. The whole chapter is excellent, if you can read it today, please do. The verses above where such a blessing. I needed to hear that my Father "pitieth" me, for I certainly fear Him! It's a joy to know that He's forgotten about my past sins, they're forgiven, so why don't I forgive myself? He knows I'm just dust, yet, He loves me anyway! I surly did need to hear that today.

How 'bout you? Are you feeling blah? Maybe you feel like a failure, and you're ready to quit? Whatever your feelings are today, just remember the following:

• Feelings change. They may not change at will, but they will change! 
• Feelings can often be manipulated by hormones, so before you give  up on life, ask yourself if these emotions could be hormone driven. I'm not saying to act badly and blame your hormones. I'm saying to consider your actions carefully because of your hormones. 
• God cares about us, even our feelings, and is always ready to listen to you and me. What a blessing!

We begin revival services this Sunday, so I have a busy weekend planned. I hope you all have a great weekend wherever you are. Please pray for our revival, if you think of it. Thank you.♥

My Morning Dose of Conviction

Psalm 78:39 For he remembered that they were but flesh; a wind that passeth away, and cometh not again.

Psalm 78 is a concise history of Israel. It rehearses the story of the Israelites as they left Egypt and traveled toward the promised land. During their journey, they complain over and over. They turn back on God over and over. Yet, over and over the Lord delivers them and provides for them.

You know, I've been catching myself complaining lately. I grumble and mumble, mostly under my breath, but it shows on my countenance that I am not content! I was just smitten by the Holy Spirit about it yesterday. Now, today, I read about the children of Israel and how they griped - and I didn't read it in Exodus, oh no! I read it in Psalms! I think the Lord is trying to tell me something. And it is this: stop complaining. I need to just take God at His Word with confidence that He will keep His promises! I know He will, I've seen Him do it over and over! So, this is not a stretch for me to believe. In fact, it should be automatic. But, I am just flesh. I fail. I often make the same mistakes over and over. I grow weary of being in this trial....when will it end?! When I feel panicky, I must turn to God, He will help me. I must guard my mouth for it will not!

I'm so grateful for this verse! I'm so happy that God remembers I'm flesh, that my life is just a breeze that will not come again. So is this trial. Contrary to popular belief, it will not last forever. He will see me through it. I'm thankful for God's mercy and forgiveness!

Well, now that I've been thoroughly convicted of my sin, I think I'll go on with my day. But not in my flesh, in His strength.

A Clean Heart

Psalm 51:3 For I acknowledge my transgressions: and my sin is ever before me.

It wasn't too long ago that one of my children came to me in tears to confess a sin. This child had taken some candy and eaten it, without asking the person who owned it - they had stolen! My husband and I would have never known had this child not come to confess. Punishment had to be given, and of course, restitution of the stolen candy had to be made out of their own cash reserves.

I know it sounds strange, but I was so happy that this whole thing happened. I wasn't glad my child had stolen, but I was so glad that they confessed! They could have buried this sin deep within their heart, and no one would have been the wiser, but they didn't. They came, in tears no less, and made things right. Joy was immediately restored to this child's heart. They had confessed, apologized and made things right. It was over and all was well.

That's how I feel when I do wrong. The Lord sees all of the sins I commit, even the ones that are only in my heart. He doesn't require that I make things right but I'm miserable until my sin is confessed and forsaken. After I talk to the Lord about it, joy is immediately restored. It's almost like a physical burden is lifted! Life never looks as wonderful as it does after I've experienced forgiveness.

Recently, I sat in church, feeling horrible. I knew what it was...it was sin! I had sin in my heart - no one knew about it but me and the Lord - but it felt as if everyone could see. I felt the Holy Spirit prompting me to lay that sin down, but on top of the sin in my heart, I also had the sin of pride! Isn't that how it works with sin? We start off when one, then it seems to multiply! I didn't want to admit that I was wrong. I stayed unhappy most of the day. Finally, I acknowledged my sin. I asked the Lord to forgive me and immediately felt relief.

The Lord had forgiven me, but I was concerned that I'd slip back into this sin again. I can relate to Psalm 51:10 Create in me a clean heart, O God: and renew a right spirit within me. I felt as though I needed to be "renewed". I needed a clean heart, free from the guilt of the past. I need to pray each morning asking God for a clean heart.Why? Because sins of the heart are very easy to fall back into. They require no outside activity. You can have a bitter spirit, bad attitude or angry heart without anyone knowing or seeing.

I'm so grateful that the Lord not only has power to forgive me and cleanse me of sin, but He also has the power to help me to stop committing sin. For me, crying out to God daily (or hourly) is the best way to stay clean.

Epic Fail

Rom. 7:18-19 For I know that in me (that is, in my flesh,) dwelleth no good thing: for to will is present with me; but how to perform that which is good I find not. For the good that I would I do not: but the evil which I would not, that I do.


Rom.7:24-25 O wretched man that I am! who shall deliver me from the body of this death? I thank God through Jesus Christ our Lord...


I recently saw a tee shirt that said "Epic Fail". It had an arrow that pointed to the right, presumably at whomever was standing there. Those words, "epic" and "fail" are widely used now days.

I cannot think of a better way to describe my Christian life at times: "Epic Fail." I seem to get caught up in the same sin over and over and over, like a hamster on a wheel. I know that I have a weakness. I pray about it. I read God's Word to get strength and wisdom to defeat it. Yet, in a momentary laps, I slip back, and into the same sin. I have no more tears to shed over it, I feel numb and hopeless. Why would God forgive me again? Why would He even want to help me? I keep failing. There's that word again, fail. That's me: Valerie, the epic failure.

I won't bother you with the details of my faults. I've been working on it for a while now, even going to the point of saying "Wow, I'm so glad I'm aware of this sin in my life. I won't do that again, now that I know!" HA! Famous last words. I don't do it intentionally, but then, I never have. Today, I read how Paul struggles with the same thing I do: failure. I read chapter 7 and 8 of Romans, searching for a way to cure myself of committing the same sin over and over. I wanted to find something like "If thou dwellest in the precepts of the Lord daily, thou wilt not sin." Or, "If thou produce meekness all the days of thy life, thou wilt be perfect." But, I didn't find those words. It appears to my very un-trained mind that the answer is this: keep going. When I fail, get up and go again. That's what Paul did. He died to his flesh and kept going for the Lord Jesus. Paul says in Rom.8:15 that we have been adopted and we can cry out "Abba, Father." That's a term of endearment. When I fail, I can cry out to my Heavenly Father. He forgives me, He picks me up, just like my earthly father would do. He comforts me, He corrects me, and He sends me back out to try again.

What a blessing it it to know that when my Heavenly Father looks at me, He doesn't see me for what I am, an epic failure. No, He sees the blood of Jesus upon my life. And Jesus never fails.

Forgetfulness and Fruitfulness

Genesis 41:51-52 And Joseph called the name of the firstborn Manasseh: For God, said he, hath made me forget all my toil, and all my father's house. And name of the second he called Ephraim: For God hath caused me to be fruitful in the land of my affliction.

Joseph had been done many wrongs in his young life. His brothers threw him in a pit, then pulled him up just to sell him into slavery. As a slave, he was falsely accused of trying to rape Potiphar's wife and then sent to prison. In prison, he interpreted dreams for Pharaoh's butler and baker, and was forgotten by the butler. Finally, in God's perfect plan and timing, Joseph was brought out of prison to interpret a dream for Pharaoh himself. Pharaoh was so impressed, that he made Joseph second in command. 

When his wife had their first child, Joseph gives us a peek into his emotions regarding the pain he suffered.He names his children Manasseh and Ephraim. Manasseh means "forgetting". But notice that Joseph didn't just "forget", no, God made him to forget. Have you noticed that if you stop re-playing past hurts over and over, that eventually you forget? It's like our brains sort of block the memory. It's happened to me, I've tried to recall some hurt from long ago, but can't quite remember. Some hurts, however, are still fresh even after years have passed. Why is that? Because some things, you just can't forget. That's when God will have to step in and "make" us to forget.

Ephraim means "fruitful". I think everyone wants to be fruitful. We want enough money, good health, popularity, and so forth. But, how can one ever be successful as a slave in a foreign country? Only God can do something like that; only our Heavenly Father can turn dire circumstances into opportunities to flourish. But we have to let Him do that. We must acknowledge Him all that we do. (Prov.3:6) We must trust Him for the grace to keep going.(2 Cor.12:9) We must also forget before we can be fruitful. Notice that's the order Joseph named his boys- forget, then you can be fruitful, unencumbered by the pain of the past.