Somebody's Watching

Matt. 27:54 Now when the centurion, and they that were with him, watching Jesus, saw the earthquake, and those things that were done, they feared greatly, saying, Truly this was the Son of God.


When I was 17 years old, my pastor's wife mentioned to me in passing one day, that her little girl wanted to wear her hair pulled up in a clip because that's how I wore mine. I remember being so surprised that her daughter, maybe about six years old, even noticed me. I didn't have much interaction with that age group. But, I was faithfully in church, and so was she. She had been sitting in her pew, taking note of my hair, and copying me.

Today, I read about how Jesus was being watched. He wasn't sitting in a pew, though. He was suffering and dying for all mankind. He knew He was being watched, because He is God. His death made a difference in a centurion standing by. That soldier recognized that He was God, just by watching Him.

This verse reminded me that in good times and bad, I'm being watched. By my children, my church family, and others whom I do not know. What are they seeing in me? Do they see Christ reflected in my life? I hope so. Folks are noticing things much more important than my hair style! Things like, how I react to trouble, sorrow, angry words, accusations, lost people, and on and on.

We just finished our revival meeting, and the Lord gave me a laundry list of things I need to work on! I don't know if I'm quite transparent enough to share them on here or not...maybe in time. I'm still praying and thinking on what needs to be changed. I want to change because I want to obey Christ. I want to reflect Him more clearly to those around me. Because somebody is watching.

I Wish I Could See You

Is. 64:1 Oh that thou wouldest rend the heavens, that thou wouldest come down, that the mountains might flow down at thy presence.


When I was a little girl, I used to wish that Jesus could come down and talk with me, face to face. To tell me that yes, He was there. To tell me what I, specifically do with my life. You know, like, "Valerie, you should become a _________ and marry __________." Of course, in time, He did show me what I should do and whom I should marry! But it would have been nice to have heard it with my ears straight from Him.

Today, this verse in Isaiah caught my attention. It's like Isaiah is saying the same thing I used to say as a kid! In fact, I just told my husband the other day that I wish Jesus could come down and see us in person! I want to cry at His feet (real feet). I want to worship and adore Him (in person), I want to hear from His lips what we should do in the situations we are facing. I wish he would "rend the heavens" and "come down".

The truth is, I can cry at His feet, worship and adore Him, and hear from His lips what He wants me to do. No, none of it is literal, but real enough through the eye of faith. And you know, He just might "rend the heavens" and call His children home to heaven today! Would that be wonderful?! Are you ready? I sure am. He's my best, and often, my only friend. I wish I could see Him, just like I wish I could see some of my real-life friends. It's a blessing to know that someday, I will see Him, and that it might be today. 

He is Real, and He is Here

Matt.11:5 The blind receive their sight, and the lame walk, the lepers are cleansed, and the deaf hear, the dead are raised up, and the poor have the gospel preached unto them.

John the Baptist is in prison. He began to doubt if Jesus was Christ. He wondered, "Art thou he that should come, or do we look for another?" in Matt.11:3. The man who baptized Jesus, heard the voice of God say, "This is my beloved Son, in whom I am well pleased" and saw the Holy Spirit descend like a dove, wondered if this was, in fact, the Christ.

Is it any wonder then, that I, who am nowhere near the Christian that John the Baptist was, sometimes question and doubt what I'm living for? I'm trying to make right choices everyday. I've made every major decision of my life based upon God's Word. I married my husband because I believed it was God's will. I chose to stay home with my children and even homeschool them because I believed that's what the Bible taught .But sometimes, friend, I wonder why I'm doing it all? I'm tired of the criticism, the lack of funds and the inferiority placed upon me by the world. I've asked the Lord, "You are there, aren't You? I am doing right, aren't I?"

When John questions Jesus from prison, Jesus gave John a message. He didn't go to him in person or send an angel to talk to him, he just sent word. He said, Go and shew John again those things which ye do hear and see: 

The blind receive their sight, and the lame walk, the lepers are cleansed, and the deaf hear, the dead are raised up, and the poor have the gospel preached unto them. (Matt.11:4-5) Jesus didn't condemn John for his lack of faith, after all, it was a momentary thing. John had suffered great things for the cause of Christ and was in prison when he began to doubt. Jesus understood that John was human. (Ps.103:14) Instead, He reminded him of the many great things that had happened. Only God could do such miracles!

He doesn't condemn me when I doubt, either. He also doesn't send a great miracle to convince me He's there. Instead, He reminds me through His Word, like He did today. He sends me a rainbow, a hummingbird or a beautiful sunset. He shows me through a friend's kind word, e-mail or note. He reminds me of past miracles that He's performed in my life, and provides for me from day to day. Only God could such miracles! And then I am comforted. I know that He is real, and He is here.

Epic Fail

Rom. 7:18-19 For I know that in me (that is, in my flesh,) dwelleth no good thing: for to will is present with me; but how to perform that which is good I find not. For the good that I would I do not: but the evil which I would not, that I do.


Rom.7:24-25 O wretched man that I am! who shall deliver me from the body of this death? I thank God through Jesus Christ our Lord...


I recently saw a tee shirt that said "Epic Fail". It had an arrow that pointed to the right, presumably at whomever was standing there. Those words, "epic" and "fail" are widely used now days.

I cannot think of a better way to describe my Christian life at times: "Epic Fail." I seem to get caught up in the same sin over and over and over, like a hamster on a wheel. I know that I have a weakness. I pray about it. I read God's Word to get strength and wisdom to defeat it. Yet, in a momentary laps, I slip back, and into the same sin. I have no more tears to shed over it, I feel numb and hopeless. Why would God forgive me again? Why would He even want to help me? I keep failing. There's that word again, fail. That's me: Valerie, the epic failure.

I won't bother you with the details of my faults. I've been working on it for a while now, even going to the point of saying "Wow, I'm so glad I'm aware of this sin in my life. I won't do that again, now that I know!" HA! Famous last words. I don't do it intentionally, but then, I never have. Today, I read how Paul struggles with the same thing I do: failure. I read chapter 7 and 8 of Romans, searching for a way to cure myself of committing the same sin over and over. I wanted to find something like "If thou dwellest in the precepts of the Lord daily, thou wilt not sin." Or, "If thou produce meekness all the days of thy life, thou wilt be perfect." But, I didn't find those words. It appears to my very un-trained mind that the answer is this: keep going. When I fail, get up and go again. That's what Paul did. He died to his flesh and kept going for the Lord Jesus. Paul says in Rom.8:15 that we have been adopted and we can cry out "Abba, Father." That's a term of endearment. When I fail, I can cry out to my Heavenly Father. He forgives me, He picks me up, just like my earthly father would do. He comforts me, He corrects me, and He sends me back out to try again.

What a blessing it it to know that when my Heavenly Father looks at me, He doesn't see me for what I am, an epic failure. No, He sees the blood of Jesus upon my life. And Jesus never fails.

Lessons from Tests

Matthew 4:1 Then was Jesus led up of the spirit into the wilderness to be tempted of the devil.

After Jesus' baptism, but before His earthly ministry began, He was tempted by the Satan. Just want to jot down a few thoughts about it.

• Jesus was tempted after he had fasted 40 days and 40 nights. He was "hungered". (Matt. 4:2) It seems we are all tempted when we are "hungry". For example, we are tempted when we are physically weak, or spiritually. The devil knows when we are most vulnerable.
• The Devil wanted Jesus to sin. If Jesus sinned, then He could no longer be our Savior, He would have been an unfit sacrifice. It would have ruined everyone's life. It seems Satan goes after those in the Christian life who have the most influence. No, no one is the same as Jesus, but think about it. If Satan can pull down a pastor or a prominent church member, he's brought down several people with them, mostly those weaker Christians we mentioned earlier. If you stand up and teach a class, you'll sit down with a target on your back.
• The Devil's method of bringing Jesus down was pride: He wanted Jesus to sin by having pride, by feeling the need to "prove himself" to Satan. Satan scorns, "If thou be the Son of God, cast thyself down: for it is written, He shall give his angels charge over thee:..." How many times have I fallen into that pride trap, wanting to "prove my point" and losing my testimony in the process! I'm so glad my Lord and Savior didn't fall for that. Another interesting point is that Satan knows God's word! How handy! He can twist it and mangle it till that weaker Christian is convinced that their un-scriptural way is, in fact, scriptural.
• Jesus wins by knowing God's Word inside and out. He quotes it, He lives it. We cannot be perfect, but we can all win the battle by knowing and living God's Word. Read it, memorize it, study it, live it. 
• It seems that we all must endure some testing before God uses us. Notice that in Matt. 4:17, after the temptation, Jesus began preaching. If you are facing a time of trial, keep in mind that God could be preparing you for a ministry. The temptation or trial you are in is not the end, it's the beginning!

Whatever the test we face, our hope is the Lord and His Word.

But thanks be to God, which giveth us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.  1 Cor. 15:57

I Just Can't Wait!

Rev. 22:20 He which testifieth these things saith, Surely I come quickly. Amen. Even so, come, Lord Jesus.

Well, I finished the New Testament. I'm not sure how long it took me, because I don't follow a schedule. I just pick parts of the Bible I like and read a chapter or two or four each day from them. I am going through the Gospels again now. I'm reading Exodus and Isaiah each day as well. When I finish a book, I decide on a new book to start.

Every time I read the verse above, I get kind of emotional. I get excited, thinking, "Yes! I cannot wait for Him to come!" and I get a bit sad, thinking "Wow, I'm already to the end. I wonder how John felt as he penned these last words?" After all, if anyone was longing for the Savior's return, it would be John! He'd been tortured, boiled in oil they say, and exiled to Patmos. I find it interesting that God came down and gave John the book of the Revelation while he was alone, probably thinking he'd been forsaken and forgotten by God. Boy, howdy! He couldn't have been more wrong! God showed John things in that dark place that He'd never revealed to anyone.

Right after my dad died, some seven years ago, I had a dream about him. I dreamed about him often, but in this one, I dreamed that Dad came down from Heaven just to tell me he loved me, and he was all right. He started describing Heaven to me! When I awoke, I thought "Was that real?" But everything Dad said to me in my dream came straight out of the Bible; nothing new. It got me excited about Heaven, though!

How wonderful to end the Bible with the plea from John the Beloved to "come, Lord Jesus."! I feel that way, too. I'm ready for Him to come. I can honestly say that I'm more excited at the thought of seeing Jesus than my dad right now. Jesus has been with me in so many dark and lonely times for so many years. I remember crying to Him when I was nine and my sister went away to college. Over the years, His song has filled my heart with joy. When no one else on Earth was with me, He was with me. He has always given me just what I've needed when I've needed it. I love Him so much! I'd like to close with the chorus of one of my favorite songs about my Friend:

Jesus, sticks closer than a brother, every moment He is near.

I know He never will forsake me, He has conquered all my fear.

Jesus sticks closer than a brother, on His love I can depend.

King of Kings! Lord of Lords! Conquering Son!

Though all of these, He's my very best friend. 

- from "My Very Best Friend" by Ron Hamilton

I just don't know what I'd do without Him. 

Jesus Says Good-Bye

So, I'm a little strange, I guess. I get really attached to characters in books, especially Bible characters, because  after all, they were real. I hate to come to the end of their lives.The end of Jesus' life is no exception. In John chapter 16, he tells the disciples about what to expect after He is gone. He says, Nevertheless I tell you the truth; It is expedient for you that I go away: for if I go not away, the Comforter will not come unto you; but if I depart, I will send him unto you... (John 16:7-8b) He goes on to tell about His death, resurrection and the second coming.

To end the chapter, Jesus says These things have I spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world. (John 16:33)
What a great way to begin my day! To be reminded that even though Jesus is gone, and has been for centuries now, I have the Comforter, the Holy Spirit. And to have Jesus say to me, in these very troubled days, that I need to be of good cheer, for HE has overcome the world! My hope is in Jesus, not in myself. I can say with confidence that I can make it, because He already has.

Oh, and isn't it nice that when I come to the end of a Bible character's life, I can just flip back a few pages and re-live it all over again? :-)

Have a wonderful day today, friends! Our hope is in the Eternal One, so let's not worry about these temporary times.

I Want to Abide in Christ

John 15:5 I am the vine, ye are the branches: He that abideth in me, and I in him, the same bringeth forth much fruit: for without me ye can do nothing. 


John chapter 15 is an excellent chapter! It has so many great things in it! If you have time today, read it over. It's only 27 verses. A couple of things caught my attention this morning. First of all, Jesus says to abide in Him, because without Him we can do nothing. You know, I've felt very powerless lately. Not that I can lose my salvation, but that no matter how hard I try, I just can't seem to accomplish anything of true, or eternal, value. I got to thinking, maybe I'm not "abiding in Him"? I wondered how I could abide in Christ? Of course, I do abide with Him always as far as my salvation goes. I can't lose that. But Jesus seems to indicate it's something other than salvation. He says in John15:10 If ye keep my commandments, ye shall abide in my love; even as I have kept my Father's commandments, and abide in his love. So, it would appear that I can abide by obeying His commandments. By keeping His commandments, and abiding, I will also have full joy (John 15:11) The commandment that Jesus stresses that we keep  is found in John 15:12 This is my commandment, That ye love one another, as I have loved you. Love one another...that seems to be the thing I struggle with the most!

So, to "abide", I must keep His commandments, particularly loving others as Christ loved me. If I do these things, He will give me full joy. I will also bring forth fruit, and that fruit will remain. (John 15:16)

One more interesting thing about this chapter, is that Jesus explains why we are hated. Let me say, I hate being hated! I want everyone to love me, or at least like me. I try to be thoughtful and kind. I do my best to go to a person immediately if I think I've hurt them in some way, and  apologize. I do all I can to keep and make friends. But, some folks just don't like me. Jesus says in John15:18-19 If the world hate you, ye know that it hated me before it hated you. If ye were of the world, the world would love his own: but because ye are not of the world, but I have chosen you out of the world, therefore the world hateth you. 

I think that's pretty clear. We, as believers, are in the world, but not of it. We march to the tune of a different drummer, you might say. We are out of step with society at large. Our lives revolve around God's Word, God's House, and our families. Not climbing the ladder at work, not spending time on the lake, or buying the latest fashions, or whatever. This seems strange to the world.

Not only are our priorities different from the world's, but we believe there is a Heaven, and a Hell. People don't like to think that there is a Hell, but God's Word says there is. We had a lady leave our church because my husband said that a certain denomination rejects the Gospel, therefore, those people are going to Hell. This didn't sit right with her. She liked someone from that church, and didn't want to think about their going to Hell. Instead of witnessing to them, she left the church. I don't understand. It wasn't my husband's opinion, it was God's, based on His own Word!

I want to abide in Christ, not depend on my own strength to see things accomplished for him. Even if it means I am hated.

Jesus Wasn't There

John 11:15 And I am glad for your sakes that I was not there, to the intent ye may believe; nevertheless let us go unto him.

John chapter 11 is about the raising of Lazarus from the dead. This was probably one of, if not the most, amazing miracles Jesus did. Jesus knew that Lazarus was sick, but in verse 4, he says that this sickness was "for the glory of God, that the Son of God might be glorified thereby." Whatever happened in this situation, it was all meant to bring glory to God. What caught my attention this morning was that Jesus says in verse 15 (above) that he was glad hewasn't there. 

How many times have I felt like Jesus wasn't around? How often have I felt forsaken, abandoned and utterly alone? Sometimes, it's just my flare for the dramatic. Other times, it could be that Jesus "isn't there" in a visible, powerful way because He has a greater purpose to accomplish than just rescuing me - He could be working in me, to bring glory to God.

Lazarus had been dead four days when Jesus arrived. I'm sure all hope was lost of his healing by that time. In fact, I'm pretty sure all hope was lost the moment he breathed his last breath.In verse 40, Jesus says to Martha, "Said not I unto thee, that, if thou wouldest believe, thou shouldest see the glory of God?" Believe. That's hard to do when one has no hope, isn't it? Yet, that is exactly what we should do. 

Because of Jesus

Genesis 39:5 And it came to pass from the time that he had made him overseer in his house, and overall that he had, that the LORD blessed the Egyptian's house for Joseph's sake; and the blessing of the LORD was upon all that he had in the house, and in the field.

As I read this verse, I noticed that God blessed the lost world because of Joseph. Joseph followed God and trusted Him, even though he was hated (for no good reason) and falsely accused of a wrong doing. I'm not sure if Joseph was aware that God was blessing Potiphar because of him or not. Because you honor God in your life, you may have no idea how God is blessing those around you, because of your testimony. One blessing that a lost person receives because of you, is that you are saved. You have the ability to share with them how they, too, can meet the Master. What a life changing effect you can have! I pray that we  all get the opportunity to share Christ with someone this week. Wouldn't it be great to see someone birthed into God's family because of our witness? 

But not only that, I believe Joseph is a picture of Jesus here. How unworthy I am to receive blessings from my Heavenly Father! I would receive none at all were it not for Jesus' righteousness being imputed upon me! When God looks at me, He sees Jesus, and He treats me as such. He has a place in Heaven prepared for me; I can converse with Him at any time, day or night; I hear His voice through the pages of His Word; I feel His correction and experience His forgiveness and mercy and comfort. The list could go on and on! I daily receive multitudes of blessings because of Jesus. And I'm so very grateful!

He Must Increase

Today is my husband's "spiritual birthday"! He's 18 today! :) I was 15 years old, living in Benton, Arkansas, and a new Christian myself. I had begun praying for God's will concerning a mate. The Lord was answering that prayer, and I wouldn't know it for another 3 years! My husband lived in Flora, Illinois, about 10 hours from where I lived. God drew him to salvation and later called him into the Gospel ministry. You can read about how we met (if you're interested)HERE. I am so grateful for God's answers to prayer. :) Anytime I talk to young girls, I tell them that while it's inappropriate to chase boys, there is nothing wrong with praying for one - the right one! I tell them to pray, and stay busy serving God until He answers.

John 3:30 says He must increase, but I must decrease. Seven little words, but such powerful words! I battle with "self" all the time! Pleasing me, doing things for me, wanting to have myideas validated, and on and on. In fact, I'm dealing with a situation in my life right now that I desperately long to change. Every day, I go to my Bible hoping to see a neon sign that says "YOU WILL GET WHAT YOU WANT, VALERIE." But so far, all I'm seeing are passages that point out how wicked my heart is or how I need to correct my ways or thoughts or both! I walk away saying "ouch!" My husband preached two great sermons yesterday, and both were things that I struggle with. 

While it is hard to face my sinful ways and correct them, there is an amazing sense of peace and relief that washes over me as I bow my head and say, "Lord, forgive me. You are right." Even after I confess my sin  to the Lord, I must fight the flesh in the days following so that I don't fall back into my old ways. I must constantly remind myself that HE must increase and I must decrease.  

My Favorite Story

I suppose my favorite story in the Bible is the story of the resurrection. Along with that, is the story of the men on the Emmaus Road. Remember that story? The men were walking along, discussing the crucifixion and Jesus walks up and starts talking to them? I love that story. Those men said in Luke 24:21 (After they had given Jesus a bit of background) "But we trusted that it had been he which should have redeemed Israel: and beside this, to day is the third day since these things were done." They were wondering what was happening - they trusted Jesus, but now He was dead - what now?  Jesus goes along with the men and expounds the Scripture. Then, Jesus starts to go on past where these men live, but they say "Please, stay with us!" (paraphrase) Jesus does just that! He sits down at the table with them and breaks bread with them. Suddenly, the men realize "This IS Jesus!". Then, Jesus vanishes. I can't imagine what that must have been like, to be sitting at my table, eating with Jesus, and not know it was He, and then when I realize it, He disappears! Verse 32 says "And they said one to another, Did not our heart burn within us, while he talked with us be the way, and while he opened to us the Scriptures?" The men immediately get up and tell everyone that Jesus is alive.

When you meet Jesus on your own "Emmaus Road", you will never be the same. I haven't seen Him with human eyes, but I've seen Him, nonetheless. I know He's here with me. I long for the day when I can see Him face to face. Until then, my heart burns within me as I walk with Him in His Word, as I talk to Him each day, and I want to shout it to the world that Jesus is alive! 

Look To Jesus

In Luke 8:41-56, we see the story of Jairus, a ruler of the synagogue, who needed Jesus to come heal his only daughter, who was dying. The situation was bleak. This poor man! He knew where to go, and that was to the Lord. But, Jesus couldn't go straight there, he got interrupted by a folks touching him for healing, one lady in particular. While Jesus was talking to her, a servant from Jairus's house came up and gave him bad news. He said, "Thy daughter is dead; trouble not the Master."

I could just see Jairus standing on a dusty road, waiting on Jesus to come with him. The sun shining down upon him, sweat dripping down his cheeks, he may have wanted to say "Please, Jesus, this an emergency!" But, he didn't say that. He was holding it together. Then his servant arrives and Jairus turns to look at him. But then, Jesus speaks, and Jairus looks back at Jesus. Jesus said "Fear not: believe only, and she shall be made whole." Jairus had to decide, will I believe the servant and his bad news? Or will I believe Jesus? As we read on, we see that he believed Jesus. While the girl had, in fact, died, Jesus took care of that! He raised her from the dead! The miracle of bringing her back to life was even greater than healing her! I've seen doctors make folks well, but I've never seen them bring a dead person back to life!

As I read this story, I saw Jairus' dilemma on that dusty road. Give up and go home? Or keep believing? Have you read the newspaper (or the internet) lately? Wars, economic collapse, earthquakes, fire, murders....oh (shuddering), it looks bad, doesn't it? Perhaps you're facing personal trial. Financial loss? Death of a loved one? Sickness? Loneliness? It's bad. But, when it looks bad, and your "servant" is telling you, "Don't trouble Jesus. It's over." Look back at Jesus, and believe. If you can't believe much, just believe a little and ask him to help you with your unbelief.(Mark 9:24) 

Don't look at the "servant" - the Devil, the World, the flesh - Look to Jesus!